MINIMAL CRIMES BRAND

Minimal Crimes began as a name for a place to put my art, writing, music, etc. and has spread to involve this website as well as a recently launched brand project. 

Minimal Crimes Brand webstore is now open.

This is just the beginning.

Stay Cursed.

minimalcrimes.storenvy.com

More reviews are coming.

Graf Orlock "Crimetraveler" Review

I was lucky enough to witness the brutality that is Graf Orlock twice live. Once in a small basement show just outside of Manchester, NH and the first time at Dude Fest in 2006 or 2007. I remember they had their first singer at the time and he was a smaller dude. He was in the air as the crowd held him up as he was blasting through songs when something happened and he fell. The band kept on blasting through and the singer let out this blood curdling scream and kept on going. it was both horrifying and amazing, much like the entirety of this bands existence.

Enter in the bands newest full length release, Crimetraveler, out on Vitriol today (Feb 5). The band is known for their use of cult movie, action, and sci-fi related themes and snippets in their songs and live shows, but this record takes that to a whole new level. This record is basically the soundtrack to their own movie. Yes, the band created a film starring themselves for which the record is written and inspired by.

 From the band:

The Crime Traveler film tells the story of a French-Canadian assassin who discovers a wormhole and travels back in time to kill American politicians so that Canada can attain superpower status in the future. As the samples selected for the album illustrate, our anti-hero zips through time and space on his mission - rubbing elbows with John Hinckley at the Reagan assassination, witnessing the Exxon Valdez oil spill, and more.

 The record is nothing short of intense and brutal. Graf Orlock brings their own hybrid of metal and hardcore punk like only they can. Sometimes overwhelming, sometimes catchy, always intense!

"Bad Cell Service On Connecticut Avenue" opens the record with a "Hey, fuckface" and blistering blast-beats and soaring guitars with some great back and forth gruff as fuck vocals. There's a great melodic riff around the middle of the track too and a really cool heavy groove at the end.

"600,000 Tons Of Explosive Ordnance" has up hitting a bong hard as fuck. Heavy, classic hardcore. I love the dual / group vocal contributions. This one is slower in pace early on with some great riffs and tom work on the drums. Enter in some techy drum and guitar work. Sweet! That little solo thing too! Shit!

"Afternoon Lunch At The Red Bacchus" is a literal kick in the balls right of the bat. The recording quality of so flipping good. The guitar tone too! Full, heavy, pummeling, and clean. What? Yes! Great groove part towards and into the end. Some sweet ride.

"A Decent Proposal In A Shitty Alley" is non-stop. This one moves. Swirling, mayhem. A montage of intensity, heavy and fast paced. A tornado of riffs, little single notes, and d-beat. I don't mean to overlook the bass either. It's the backbone to these tracks. It gives that girth and linger to these songs. Always present. Always a necessity.

"Regional Turf War Spills Blood On Vegas Strip" has some of the fastest chugs I have ever heard and then that melodic part. This song is one of my favorites on the record. It takes a few different turns, each lasting just long enough and it demands a second or third or... well you get it.

"Nursing A Hangover" is something we all experience, but how about nursing one while you spill a fuck ton of oil into the ocean. You shit-turd. This is the song where the crowd completely looses their minds. The circle pits, the stage dives, running on top of people heads as far as you can until diving into the masses. Guitar slides, jumping off the kick drum, microphone to the forehead, blood, spit, people are screaming, you're in it now.

"Our Infallible Cybernetic Future" wants to know if "you're on the list, fuckface." You're probably not. It's better off, probably. You can't handle it anyways. This song has this sweet twisty dizzy sounding riff. The vocals in these tracks are so good. This band has some of the best back and forths and they each have a great gruff voice. Sometimes you get a band that try to do this but one dude sounds like an idiot. This isn't the case.

"Summer Getaway , Mount Hermon" is drippy and painful. Laugh it up. "I got an itch on the boys." This is the shortest song on the record and another one of my favorite. It's catchy and a real headbanger. There's a little solo part in there that rules.

"Difficult Decisions In The Yutani Mess Hall" makes you want to re-think that decision... This one moves. The guitar is like a whirlwind. It's like swelling and I got wicked dizzy. It was weird. Like vertigo or something.

"Cheaper, Safer, And Better Than The Real Thing" closes the record. "This is the problem with Earth today." This is how you end a record. With a fucking bang. A heavy build up throughout to this creepy credits rolling piano piece. "Go back to Mars."

As if the record and the content isn't enough, the packaging sets the bar even higher. This record is packaged with a full color 12-page news paper based on the content of the film / record.

Exploration Of The Rift In The Space-Time Continuum

Get the record now!

Parquet Courts "Dust" Track Review

Parquet Courts is releasing a new record, Human Performance, on Rough Trade on April 8. They just dropped their first song / video off the new record and it's so good.

"Dust" is a heavy reminder that everywhere you go, no matter what you do, no matter how many showers you take or how many times you "sweep," everything is filthy. You are filthy. Everything you touch is dirty. "Dust is everywhere, sweep," the song repeats. And it's true. An uncomfortable realization projected right into your face and your eardrums. Anxious, overwhelming, driving, this song rules.

The constant thumping of bass, riffs, and monotone classic vocals give way to a heavy anxiety-filled whirlwind of decay and noise that swirls around until you inevitably crack and peel the bugs off your rotten flesh you filthy pile of perfection.

Shit got weird there.




Tour Dates:

02-15 Milwaukee, WI - Turner Hall !
02-16 Chicago, IL - Thalia Hall !
02-18 Minneapolis, MN - Triple Rock Social Club !
02-19 Calgary, Alberta - Commonwealth Bar
02-20 Vancouver, British Columbia - Rickshaw Theater
02-23 Seattle, WA - Neumos
02-24 Portland, OR - Wonder Ballroom
02-26 Oakland, CA - The New Parish @
02-27 Los Angeles, CA - American Legion Hall @
02-27 Los Angeles, CA - American Legion Hall
03-12 Marfa, TX - Marfa Myths $%
04-14 Providence, RI -The Met ^
04-15 Boston, MA - Paradise Rock Club ^
04-16 Kingston, NY - BSP Kingston ^
04-17 Pittsburgh, PA - Spirit ^
04-18 Columbus, OH - Ace of Cups ^
04-20 Chicago, IL - Metro ^
04-21 Detroit, MI - Marble Bar ^
04-22 Toronto, Ontario - Phoenix Theater ^
04-28 Dallas, TX - Granada Theater
04-30 Austin, TX - Levitation Festival
05-02 Houston, TX - Fitzgerald's
05-11 Philadelphia, PA - Union Transfer *
05-12 Washington, DC - 9:30 Club *
05-13 Carrboro, NC - Cat's Cradle *
05-15 Atlanta, GA - Shaky Knees Festival
05-16 Nashville, TN - Mercy Lounge *
05-17 Asheville, NC - The Mothlight *
05-18 Charlottesville, VA - Jefferson Theater *
05-20 New York, NY - Webster Hall *
06-04 Barcelona, Spain - Primavera Sound Festival
06-12 London, England - Field Day
06-14 Bristol, England - Trinity
06-15 Liverpool, England - New Kazimier
06-16 Edinburgh, Scotland - La Belle Angele
06-17 Leeds, England - Irish Centre
06-18 Manchester, England - Gorilla

! with Love Of Everything
@ with Chris Cohen
$ with No Age
% with Sheer Mag
^ with Soda
* with B Boys

Deftones "Prayers/Triangles" Track Review

Deftones is one of those bands for me that will always be timeless and always manages to crank out solid records. I feel like I like them more the older I get and the more they progress. Their latest album, Koi No Yokan, was really solid. I feel like their records have become more of a solid unit in these later years than the older records like Around The Fur and Adrenaline. Those records are solid but they have distinct parts (songs) that stick out where as Koi No Yokan, for me, was a whole piece. There wasn't specifics that stood out, but I found that ok.

Ramble....

So the 'Tones just dropped the first song off their forthcoming record, Gore, which will be out on April 8.

The song has some great melodic delay guitar parts during the verse parts and a really great chorus with soaring guitars and drums. This band just cranks them out so hard. I remember there was a point where I thought Chino lost the classic scream, but there is this great little mellowed out / breakdown / bridge part with some heavy guitar work and that classic Chino scream.

This makes me happy.

Check out the audio / video below.




They will be touring as well!

03-05 Costa Mesa, CA - MUSINK Festival
03-16 Mission, TX - Never Say Never Festival
03-19 San Antonio, TX - Lonestar Events Center
03-20 Dallas, TX - Southside Ballroom
03-22 Houston, TX - Revention Music Center
03-24 Lubbock, TX - Lonestar Pavilion
05-08 Kannapolis, NC - Carolina Rebellion
05-13 Atlanta, GA - Shaky Knees Music Festival
06-03 London, England - SSE Arena Wembley
06-04 Nürburgring, Germany - Rock am Ring
06-05 Numberg, Germany - Rock im Park
06-09 Nickelsdorf, Austria - Nova Rock
06-10 Leicestershire, England - Download Festival
06-14 Cologne, Germany - Palladium
06-15 Berlin, Germany - Columbiahalle
06-17 Aarhus, Denmark - NorthSide Festival
06-18 Reykjavik, Iceland - Secret Solstice

Twin Peaks "Walk To The One You Love" Track Review

Chicago's Twin Peaks just dropped the first track off their third full length record, Down In Heaven, which will be out May 13 on Communion.

The song "Walk To The One You Love" is a smooth driving jam from days past. It has this rocking twangy guitar riff through the whole thing that really kicks ass. The song is accompanied by some great claps, some wonderful harmonies, and it's just so damn catchy. I've been rocking this thing all day. The track has so much to offer. There are so many different pieces put together in this thing. Guitar solo, "la-la-la" harmonies, some more girthy vocal parts, some fast drumming during this little piece.

Go west right, and hit the coast, and then drive that thing with the top down. You're out there looking for her / him / whoever, and you have the sun and the surf, and you know they are there. Just go you young thing. Go. "Walk to the one you love."

Stream the song below.

Read the sweet article on NME with singer Cadien Lake James about the new album.




Tour Dates:

02-24 Madison, WI - The Frequency
02-25 Des Moines, IA - Vaudeville Mews
02-26 Sioux Falls, SD - Total Drag [two shows]
02-27 Iowa City, IA - Blue Moose Tap House
03-09 Champaign, IL - The Accord
03-10 Nashville, TN - Exit In 
03-11 Columbia, MO - Cafe Berlin
03-12 Bloomington, IN - Blockhouse
04-15 Sheffield, England - Picture House Social Club
04-16 Glasgow, Scotland - Stereo
04-17 Manchester, England - Deaf Institute
04-19 London, England - Camden Barfly
04-21 Paris, France - La Mécanique Ondulatoire
04-22 Évreux, France - L'abordage
04-23 Reze, France - Festival L'Ere de Rien
04-29 Austin, TX - Levitation 
05-13 Chicago, IL - Lincoln Hall
06-02 Nelsonville, OH - Nelsonville Music Festival
06-09 Manchester, TN - Bonnaroo Music Festival